--I went out yesterday afternoon and got some stuff done, so I’m
not quite so stressed today.My
parents will be here tomorrow though, and there are still a million or
so things left to do.But it’ll
all work out somehow, right?I’m
reasonably semi-certain of it.
The first stop on my Holiday Desperation Tour ’07 was the post office,
where the Surf Report PO Box is located. It’s over near my old job,
and I’m rarely in that part of town anymore.What was once convenient, is now kinda stoopid and out of the
way...
But what are you going to do?No
way in hell I’m giving up PO Box
4!
I’ve never had a number that low before.And I’m not surrendering it.
By the time I get over there to check it, though, the shit is usually packed
solid with Wal-Mart fliers, pizza coupons, pre-approved credit card
offers, and pleas for donations from Friends of the Shiftless, or
whatever.Occasionally I’ll get
lucky and there will be a new copy of The
Inner Swine
in there, or a zine from Marc Parker, but usually it’s a rather bleak
affair.
But the last two times I’ve been pleasantly
surprised by gifts from Surf Reporters...And how cool is that? Hm?
A couple of weeks ago I
received a CARE package from Diane, which included all manner of
information about New York City.There was a load of menus from restaurants she recommends,
fliers, magazines, etc.Plus
she sent along a deck of these
cards, which detail 50 walking tours
a person can take in Manhattan.Very cool.Oh, and she
also sent Beer Nuts!
And yesterday I received a copy of the bookRivethead,
from Surf Reporter Greg.He
says the writing reminds him of TheWVSR, and I’m looking forward
to getting into it.
Thanks guys, I really appreciate it!It beats the living crap out of an information packet from
the Discover Card, addressed to Mrs. Kay Jeffreys.It really does.
After the post office, I made a beeline for Subway and had a
footlong BMT (with lettuce, tomato, onion, and green peppers… no
sauce or dressing of any kind, because the sandwich engineers cannot
be trusted to exhibit even a modicum of restraint), and a small root
beer.
Then I went to a few stores, including Target.There, I kept running into some gum-chewing, Teamsters
windbreaker-wearing, mustache-having, cocky posture-adopting
asshole, everywhere I turned.The
dude was making me go grrrr,
but I kept it to myself.Because,
you know, he looked like he’d kicked some ass recently, and
wasn’t averse to kicking a little more.
I checked out their DVD section, and saw that they have I
Love Lucy, the entire
series, on sale for $109.I’d
just looked at it on Amazon the day before, and they want $189.So Target’s price is very good indeed, which is probably
why they only had a sign and no actual DVDs in stock.
I’m not sure I’ll ever buy a copy, but I asked a woman there if
I could get a raincheck.She
said, “No, I don’t think we’re giving out rainchecks for that
item.” I asked her why, and she answered, “OK ok, come with me and
I’ll give you one.”Wow!That didn’t exactly require a waterboarding session.
I bought Toney a gift, and myself a York Peppermint Patty (homo
discus), and went to the next store, and the next one after that.I picked up a few more items along the way, and was marking
crap off my list all willy-nilly.
Then I went to Staples, and spent a good long time standing in front
of the ink replacements, hoping to find something that would bring
my beloved bunker pens back to life.And I experienced the thrill of victory!There was one
two-pack on the shelf, marked down to 78 cents (discontinued?!), and
I snapped it up.If they’d
had ten, I would’ve bought ten.
From now on, I’m going to be on high-alert for those bastards…And I’m only going to write stuff when it’s absolutely
necessary.Or whatever.
After shopping I returned home, watched some Drake
& Josh with the Secrets,
had dinner, fell asleep in a chair, went to pick up the oldest
Secret at swimming practice, talked to Steve for a while, watched
two episodes of 24,
screwed around on the computer, and went to sleep.
And that was my Thursday, more or less.Did you do anything exciting?What about the holidays?Are
you ready, or dragging-ass like I am?Do you have people coming to visit, or are you traveling, or
what?Are you planning to
cook
something like this,
by any chance?Bring us
up to date in the comments, if you’re so inclined.
Before I turn it over to Chris, I want to wish you folks a wonderful
holiday, whichever one you celebrate.I probably won’t have a chance to write again until my
folks leave town, so this is it.
Thanks for stopping by everyday.I appreciate it more than you know.Somehow
we’ve managed to create a nice little community of dysfunction
here,
and I couldn’t be happier about it.I hope you guys have a great holiday, and I’ll see you on
the other side.
Now here’s the Angry White Guy, to close out the category.
