Are you fatigued by all the guilt-based "awareness" days (or weeks or months) we're constantly being hit with, and long for something a little less earnest? Yeah, we're with ya. Oh, we understand the importance of events such as Buy a Paper Star to Help Ease the Suffering of People Who Participate in the Annual Senior Citizens Are Being Bilked Out of Their Life Savings! Awareness 5K Charity Walk for Deaf Minorities and People with Face Cancer, but where's the fun? 

We propose just one day a week, Thursday, be set aside for themes not quite so depressing and accusatory. Below is our preliminary calendar, as well as a handy link where folks can provide suggestions for additional themes. None of which should require anyone to donate money, wear a ribbon, sport a rubber bracelet, or give up a Saturday...

                                                       Together, we can build a more perfect week!

2010 2011 Thursday Theme
January 7 January 6 Talk like your jaw's wired shut.
January 14 January 13 Pretend to be Canadian.
January 21 January 20 Sashay like a dandy.
January 28 January 27 Blink too much.
February 4 February 3 Put one finger in your ear, as if you're receiving a transmission.
February 11 February 10 Wallow in self-pity.
February 18 February 17 Scream every fifth word.
February 25 February 24 Fake a seizure.
March 4 March 3 Answer the phone, "Rectal and Anal?"
March 11 March 10 Talk through your nose like a person from Wisconsin.
March 18 March 17 Stomp and clap the "We Will Rock You" beat.
March 25 March 24 Buck your teeth way out.
April 1 March 31 Forego hygiene.
April 8 April 7 Grow progressively more haughty.
April 15 April 14 Constantly lick your front teeth.
April 22 April 21 Windmill right arm while walking.
April 29 April 28 Mutter about fish.
May 6 May 5 Hock a goober.
May 13 May 12 Talk into your sleeve, like a Secret Service agent.
May 20 May 19 Make your voice quiver with righteous indignation.
May 27 May 26 Wince 'n' fidget.
June 3 June 2 When finished talking, add "Mmmm..." to the end of your statements.
June 10 June 9 Feign Catholicism.
June 17 June 16 Fixate on Maine Coons.
June 24 June 23 Tell stories about Abraham Lincoln that are not true.
July 1 June 30 Bring an enormous pepper mill to work, and ask everyone if they'd like pepper on that.
July 8 July 7 Snicker whenever someone uses the word "long."
July 15 July 14 Shrug at random times, and say, "Hey, if the shoe fits."
July 22 July 21 Pretend to have an underbite.
July 29 July 28 Get trapped inside an invisible mime box.
August 5 August 4 Repeatedly throw double thumbs-ups, and say, "Aaaay!" like the Fonz.
August 12 August 11 Draw a John-Boy mole on your face.
August 19 August 18 Ask people how much money they make in a year, and don't let it drop.
August 26 August 25 Place a salad spinner on the corner of your desk, occasionally give it an enthusiastic crank, and refuse to answer questions about it.
September 2 September 1 Carry around a fake beard, but never put it on.
September 9 September 8 Repeatedly flinch like you're anticipating an explosion.
September 16 September 15 Threaten to quit both your jobs and move back to Denmark.
September 23 September 22 Clip your toenails in the break room.
September 30 September 29 Desperately beg for forgiveness.
October 7 October 6 Walk around with Pringles shards stuck to your face and neck.
October 14 October 13 Occasionally grab the side of your head and scream, "The plate! Dear God, the plate!!"
October 21 October 20 Speak knowingly about Fliegelman's Law of Tall Socks.
October 28 October 27 Infect as many people as possible with the Sleepy's Mattress Center jingle.
November 4 November 3 Pretend to have a Kraft caramel sealed to the roof of your mouth.
November 11 November 10 While exiting the bathroom rub your stomach, and say, "Wow!"
November 18 November 17 Bitch about President Ford.
November 25 November 24 Make references to inside jokes that do not exist, wink a lot.
December 2 December 1 Whenever you sneeze, holler "DAVE CONCEPCION!!"
December 9 December 8 Attempt to steer every conversation toward Cobb salad.
December 16 December 15 Act like something's about to fall on you.
December 23 December 22 At twelve minutes past every hour, stand up, yell "IT'S NOT FAIR!!" then sit back down.
December 30 December 29 Wear a fanny pack full of boiled eggs to work.
Suggest a theme!    

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