--
We received a scary phone call this morning, from a grocery store.
Wegman’s, to be precise. According to the pre-recorded message, we
purchased ground beef from them “in October,” from a lot number
that’s been recalled following reports of E. coli.
I
told Toney about this, and she said we’ve already ingested all
hamburger bought at Wegman’s, and the last of it might have been used to make
tacos earlier in the week. <gulp>
But
you instantly get sick, right? That’s what we were telling each
other, hoping it was true. However… according to this
page, there’s a one-week incubation period, then it’s 10
or more violent liqui-shits per day, “all blood and no stool.”
And
I can’t have that.
--
Speaking of disturbing messages, I received an email a couple of days
ago from a supposed “domain name register center” in China.
At first glance I thought it was just another in a long line of
scamulation attempts. But on further review, I think it might actually
be legit.
They’re writing me, they say, because someone is attempting to buy
up various thewvsr domains, with extensions such as .biz, .cc, .info,
.mobi, etc.The note is in
broken-English, but they’re apparently asking for my opinion, and
trying to avoid a copyright challenge down the road.
Any idea how I should handle this?I don’t really give a crap about the domains they mentioned,
but I’m concerned someone might be positioning themselves to someday
make a claim on TheWVSR itself.
What do you think?Do I
have anything to worry about?Help
me out, people.
--And I think I owe our
garbage men an apology.Remember
how I ranted and raved last week, because I came home and found trash
strewn across the lawn?The
maggot-masher had been here while I was away, and I assumed the
garbage men were the reason for the mess.
But yesterday I dragged everything out to the curb, and an hour later
there was shit all over the place again.And the garbage men hadn’t even arrived yet.So, what the hell??
Was it a dog?I doubted
it.There aren’t too
many hounds walking around loose these days.Raccoons?Oh, they’re certainly capable, but in bright daylight?Somehow that didn’t seem to fit, either.
And while I contemplated this mystery, I saw two huge black birds,
possibly crows, come swooping down and perch on the lip of our garbage
can.Then they both just
went to town, digging and ripping at that stuff.Lettuce leaves and snot rags were flying in every direction.
Without thinking, I ran out there and began shooing the things away.They didn’t seem to be afraid of me, but halfheartedly took
off when I got within five feet.
I was spewing profanity and picking that crap up (once again), when
those bastards started yelling
at me.I’m not kidding, they were sitting high up in the trees,
hollering down – in threatening tones.
I’m not proud of this fact, but it kinda freaked me out.They just sounded so invested
in their cause.So I went back inside.
--I was held hostage at
Target yesterday, by Sunshine.I’d
told Toney I needed to buy contact lens solution, and she suggested I
invite Sunny to ride along.Apparently
The Victim had complained of boredom while Toney worked the previous
day, and Toney thought an outing might keep her happy (quiet) for a while.
“No way!” I shouted instinctively.But then I started feeling guilty again…She was just hanging around the house, dragging her tubing and
looking all sad and trapped.So
I reluctantly asked if she wanted to go to Target with me.
And man, I’ve never seen a broken-down invalid move so fast.Within minutes she was completely dressed and waiting by the
front door, acting all impatient and ready to go.
As we passed through the front door of the store, I said “Catch up
to ya later,” and went off on my own.My niceness has its limits, and I’m sure as shit not going to
hang around while Sunshine looks at every scarf and giganta-bra
currently in stock.
So I went to the electronics department, and checked out their digital
cameras.Then I looked at
CDs, DVDs, and books.After
that, I went to the men’s department, and saw that they have all
their shorts marked all the way down to $4.48.I thought about buying a couple pairs, but decided against it.
I went up to the front of the store again, and called Toney on my cell
phone.We talked for about
fifteen minutes.Then I
bought my contact stuff and took it out to my car, returned to the store
and began looking for Sunshine.
And she’d made it approximately twenty yards up the main clothing
aisle, the first and only aisle she’d visited so far -- with lots and
lots of real estate left to cover.
So I hung out in the snack bar, and talked on my phone.I had a long conversation with Steve, followed by a shorter one
with my parents.Then I
monkeyed around with my cell phone, buying 24 hours worth of internet
access for $1.I managed
to read my Google email, and check the headlines at Drudge.Pretty cool.
When I got bored with that, I returned to the car, put the seat all the
way back and stared at the roof.Then I went back into the store, bought a Dr. Pepper in the
snack bar, and sat down again.
Eventually I saw Sunny sauntering behind a shopping cart piled high,
like she didn’t have a care in the world.She was just casually looking at this and that, in no hurry
whatsoever.Amazingly, I
watched as she spent upwards of ten minutes in the jewelry department.Who goes to the jewelry department at Target??I’m not even sure I knew it existed.
She spent $174, and purchased a DVD copy of Uncle
Buck(?!),
a big red suitcase (while
she’s traveling), a case of some kind of Coke in a copper-colored
can, and all manner of additional crapola.
While we were pulling out of the parking lot she asked if I wanted to
go to Panera for a coffee and a pastry, her treat.I said
NO, and drove straight home.And when we got here, I was secretly hoping those crows would
get her.
--Here’s another Surf
Reporter in a Surf Report shirt.This
time an action shot…I
only have one shirt left for purchase, a size L in dark blue.Email me if you want it, and we’ll make the proper
arrangements, as they say.
--And I usually don’t
pass along stuff like this.But
it made me laugh, so why the hell not?Check it
out.What
would 24
look like if it had been filmed in 1994?
--Finally, something new
and good from our old friend Buck.Right
here.
And I don’t really have a Question for you today, partly because of
high-distraction, and partly because of a low-watt hangover.So use
the comments to talk about whatever you feel like talking about. Sunshine is supposed to be gone by Sunday evening, so
things should return to normal soon...
