I'm loaded with
tumors darling, and I don't even know it.
October 17, 2007
Fast food
disconnects, and the second race
--Speaking of lunch… why do kids always want to go to
McDonald’s?
Sometimes I’m put in charge of providing an evening meal for the
Secrets, and always think:Hmmm,
I guess I could make a nice salad, grill some chicken breasts, and
maybe cook up a little rice and a vegetable as a side…
Then I come to my senses and say, “Pick a restaurant, somewhere
cheap.”
And whenever I add somewhere
cheap, which is code for fast food, they always want to go to
McDonald’s.Every single
time.What’s that
place’s hold over children?What’s
the attraction?My kids
are too old for Happy Meals, and that kind of bullshit, they just seem
to genuinely like the food.And
I don’t understand it.
Oh, I have no major problem with McDonald’s.I mean, it beats the crap out of Burger
King.Burger Kings are always brown and dingy, and populated by
people (on both sides of the counter) who have very likely appeared on
the Smoking Gun.At least
you don’t usually fear a
liver-stabbing at a McDonald’s, and their fries are good.
But a first choice?!I
think not.Wendy’s is
the clear king of mega-chain fast food.How can that even be argued?I submit that it cannot.But
our kids don’t like it for some reason.I try to get them to tell me why.But they must’ve taken some kind of oath, because they both
become suspiciously tight-lipped when the subject is brought up.
Here’s how I rank the Big Three:Wendy’s, McDonald’s, Burger King.And here’s how our kids rank them:McDonald’s, Burger King, Wendy’s.As you can see, there’s a disconnect.
And you can’t use Taco Bell as a dodge, because it tastes good while
it’s going down, but you’re starving again before you get to the
car.And every visit to
Long John Silver’s clips six weeks off the back-end of your life,
and it’s shockingly expensive.
Five Guys is out, because the oldest Secret doesn’t like it.Yeah, I don’t understand that either…And we have no Hardee’s up here, not that I’d set foot in
one anyway.KFC? NFW.So we usually just end up at McDonald’s again, eating salt by
the handful, and smiling through a box beard of grease and special
sauce.
Am I the only one who experiences a child/adult fast food disconnect?Tell me how you handle it.And how do you rank the Big Three?I’ve got it right, don’t I?Damn right, I do.Also,
do you have any insight into the anti-Wendy’s kiddie oath?It’s a mystery that ranks right up there with teenage girls
who talk with a creaking door voice, and teenage boys who play phantom
drums all day long.
Oh, and I live in Pennsylvania, so there’s no need to tell me how
great In-N-Out Burger is.We
don’t have them here.I
did, however, live in Californiafor four years, and am very
familiar with the In-N-Out experience, so to speak.Their burgers: excellent; their fries: overrated.But even if it was the greatest place in the history of the
world, it wouldn’t do me any good in Scranton.Ya know?
--This one’s kinda
short, but I’ve got a full docket today.I’ll leave you now with this
link, and a random,
plucked-from-the-ass question to go along with it:what’s the second most prevalent race in your town?Ours is Asian, in case you were wondering.
