| Op-Ed
by Rocky from the Insane
Asylum
My State Job I am basically the safety guy for a state psych hospital. My responsibilities on paper look quite impressive and extensive: Safety, Fire Safety, Security, Utilities, Equipment, Hazardous Waste, etc. In reality I have little to do (and my salary unfortunately reflects this). But I decided years ago to trade $$$ for time, and I have been largely successful (almost like a teacher with summers off). This year I have 15 Holidays and 15 Vacation days that I have to take. That’s six glorious weeks. Here are my monthly responsibilities and their time constraints: Input of injury reports and related : 6 hours Conduct training: 3 hours Attend/ prepare for various meetings: 7 hours Miscellaneous: 5 hours That’s it. I can legitimately state that I work 21 hours out of 80. Hey, that’s over 25%. Not bad for the public sector. True, at times things can and do crop up that require my attention, but I never EVER have approached the 50% threshold. God forbid. Wouldn’t it be better to stay busy all the time you ask? I guess my day would go a little quicker, but I would miss the following typical day: Surfing the net 3 hours Lunch/Breaks 1 hour (mandatory according to state regs) Work 1 hour Reading magazines/books 1 hour Plotting and carrying out pranks 30 minutes Listening to coworker bullshit about hunting/4-wheeling/seeing Alan Jackson in concert, etc. 90 minutes (It Fucking Feels Like 90 Minutes Anyway) Speaking of country music, I definitely feel that music preferences and IQ are positively correlated as follows: Music Preference IQ Country 80 Top 40 100 Classic Rock 120 (artificially low due to alcohol abuse) Alternative 130 Jazz 140 Classical 150 (I know, I don’t get it either) Of course if you change the IQ column to Domestic Abuse or Drive a Truck then Country would win out. I guess it’s all on how you look at it. Read other heart-tugging Op-Ed's from Rocky! Ninny
Heaven |