Classic Living in the Peach State by Jason Castleberry July 28, 2004 Poker!!! Any one out there recently become a poker fan? I've always wanted to play but never wanted to take the time to learn the rules (which for most games are pretty easy) or recruit a group of people who would be willing to play. I've always felt that local poker games are dominated by rednecks who would have no problem kicking someone's teeth in and calling them a cheater or a gator fan. It would be like the scene in Tombstone where Billy Bob Thorton is harassing the shit out of some poor bastard, making him fold cards and terrified for his life. I want no part of that, cause win or lose there'd be a good chance I'd end up buried in some heavily wooded area next to some guy's deer-hunting stand. However, things have recently begun to change in the world of poker. I mean I could still end up worm food if I get caught up in the wrong game, but at least now there are a lot more people to play against and local venues are supporting tournaments. Chris Moneymaker's win in the World Series of Poker last year has been a major proponent as well as the game's exposure on ESPN, Bravo, and the Travel channel. Moneymaker was a total unknown going into the tournament, but played smart, got real lucky, and won 2.5 million dollars. He's an accountant from Tennessee for Christ's sake! I've often spent many evenings over the past few months watching poker on TV, salivating over the pot, and wondering if I could somehow make a killing at the tables. Hell, I've seen celebrities play like ass and still win matches. Of course they were playing with other celebrities, but that's not the point. If some less than average intelligence pretty boy can win a poker tournament (see Ben Affleck), then why cant' I? He won an Oscar and had sex with J-lo too, it must be tough to have a charmed life. My obsession has grown now to the point where I bought a poker table-top that seats eight and a shit ton of poker chips. Not the crappy $2 for a 100 either. The ones I have are pretty nice, but not Vegas quality. A set of 250 clay chips (Vegas type) run for about $100. I don't have that kind of money. I've been in four games so far and have won twice, unfortunately, that was the first two times. On a table of eight, I have now gone out first and third the last two times I've played. It's hard to win when you don't have the cards. By the way, bluffing doesn't seem to work on a table with at least three beginners, they don't get the concept of sitting out hands. But then again, what do I know. Anyway, there is a Tuesday night Texas Holdem Poker Tournament at a local club/bar here that I plan on checking out. I may even do it tonight, of course you won't know the results until next week though. I might dedicate the next column to it. The weekly top prize is an X-box and there's a winner's tournament for trip to Vegas. I think I feel lucky... A Time to Say Goodbye It seems that the end is near for my 1981 Oldsmobile 98 Regency. It started running a little rough last week and so I took it in to have it looked at and the transmission is fucked. The cost to replace it is more than the value of the car. I guess its time to go car shopping with no budget. Good times! I can't get that angry though. I bought it for $900 in March 2001 from an old guy who took really good care of it. Since then, I've put about $1100 worth of work into it. Not a bad investment seeing that I couldn't afford car payments at the time. Interestingly enough, I spent more on insurance than upkeep. Anyway, my plan is to drive it back and forth to work for the next few months until I can save some cash to get a new one. So, if any of you readers out there have a good running vehicle in the $1200 range that you'd be interested in selling, send me an email at jacsv76@hotmail.com. It would probably help if you were within 100 miles of Athens, GA. Movie of the Week I'm trying to keep the theme up here and so this week I will give you ten reasons to watch another personal favorite of mine. This 1997 film features action, romance, contract killings, and a little bit of comedy. The movie is Grosse Pointe Blank and here is why you should see, own, and idolize this film. 1) The premise - a contract killer/assassin comes home for his 10-year-high school to kill the father of the girl he was once/still in love with. 2) Minnie Driver - I have to come clean, I've had a crush on her ever since Good Will Hunting. Too bad none of the women at my reunion held up that well. 3) John Cusack - He's brilliant in this movie. I don't think he gets enough credit for being the perfect everyman actor. With his body of work, everyone should have some role they identify with him on. This one really does it for me, it just sucks that i didn't turn out to be an assassin. I guess its not to late, but i don't think I'd be motivated for the years of training. I like fast food too much. 4) The kitchen scene where Martin Blank (Cusack) beats to death a random hitman while proclaiming his love for Debi Newberry (Driver). If my life was only that romantic. Sure I could club Ryan with a pan in the kitchen while Sonya watches, but it wouldn't be the same. I have no comedic timing and it would just seem more like a Sopranos episode. "Die you motherfucker...I love you babe." 5) Martin confessing to his therapist. These scenes are great and I wonder if the premise might have been lifted as one of the plotlines for the Sopranos. This movie did come out three years before the Sopranos. I think I'd have my lawyer look into this. 6) The tiny Scandanavian hitman is hilarious. The fight scene between Blank and this guy is great. It's like watching a full grown adult beat up and ten-year-old fat kid. 7) How would you feel if you left town for ten years to find out the house you once grew up in has been torn down and replaced with a gas station? Check out Martin's response. 8) Jeremy Piven is in the movie playing Jeremy Piven, which is always good for a few laughs. On a side note, Piven has starred in both Old School and PCU, but which one is the better college themed movie? Mark your calendars, I'll tackle this hard hitting question sometime in the near future. Feel free to email me you opinion on this. It may make the column. 9) According to the box, TIME magazine called the movie "fresh & funny". That should mean something shouldn't it. 10) I have a huge crush on Minnie Driver. There, I said it. I'm not ashamed. I can do math. Why didn't she call me back... Ok, that's all for the week. Hope you enjoyed it and I'll see you next time, I suppose. Once again thanks for the invites I've been receiving in regards to my great American road trip that I'm planning to take next Spring. See the previous column for more information. You can always email me with any questions, comments, or invites at jacsv76@hotmail.com. West Coast where you at? |
