by "Buck"

Introduction

Although this wasn't planned, it has worked out rather nicely that Chris from Boone's series on the Florida years has wrapped up.  I too have finished most of the high points of my life as a redneck kid growing up in the hills of southwestern Virginia.  I have another series that someday I'll put together entitled Jethro Gets His Learnin'.   There are a myriad of stories from three fun-packed years at the University of Tennessee in the late 1980's.  However, those stories will have to remain unwritten for now.  Mr. Kay has been kind enough to allow me to continue my own series on the WVSR as well. Since Chris has entitled his "Straight from Boone."  I've decided to play on the name and call mine "Straight from the Holler'"

I suppose there will be a learning curve for some of the readers.  I've noticed on the message board many of you are from outside the confines of the Appalachian region of the United States.  The term "holler'" is colloquial slang for the term "hollow."  I realize if something is empty it is "hollow."  However, here in the mountains a low spot between two hills is termed a "hollow" as well.   Perhaps an empty hill is the origination of the term. As we hillbillies are known to do we never finish a word without adding an "-er."  Therefore if you say "hollow" rather than "holler'" you quite obviously "ain't from 'round jeer."  One final pointer, the "mouth of the holler'" is the area where the "holler" begins.   The "head of the holler'" is at the peak of the ridge from which the two hills are descending.  The phrase "up the holler'" is normally a reference as to how to get somewhere.  Most of the time hollers' only have one road-occasionally you'll find one that has two roads that split.  The area where the roads converge is known as the "forks of the holler".   It's widely accepted by outsiders that the further "up the holler'" one lives, the more redneck they are.   This isn't necessarily true, but that's the common misconception.  This is also the basis for my often used term "holler monster." 

Anyway, I don't plan to address politics in my column.  I get enough of that shit at work and generally when you dive into politics you piss off half the people you're trying to entertain.  Therefore, I'll dispatch with that-although I will provide a well-placed jab or two if the opportunity for humor presents itself.

Finally, I'm still a little green at this business of zine-writing.   I don't know what kind of audience I'm writing for.  I don't know who's reading and I really don't know how I come off.  Some of you probably find it amusing.  A few will find it hilarious.  I'm figuring the majority of you will sit back and go-what a fucked up idiot.    I do not profess to be nearly as witty or well written as Chris from Boone or Mr. Kay.  Guess that's why they are the stars of the site and I'm simply filling time for them to catch their breath and the next gem of comedic gold.    However, I'll try and if you don't like it-go fuck yourself.

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