Straight from the holler.

                          

  by "Buck"

December 17, 2004

In the spirit of the holidays, I should make some amends.  First of all, I think Mr. Kay-my default boss, as semi-regular columnist on the WVSR is a great guy.  Yes, I take great pleasure in busting his balls down to nutmeg and ground cinnamon.  However, we all enjoy busting on each other.. it's the common thread that binds.  Mr. Kay and I are okay (I'm assuming) therefore you can direct all of your Jeff apologist e-mails somewhere else.  It's part of the charm of the site.  I feel privileged that  he allows me the outlet of exploding with a rage of words here rather than taking it out on others in my life.  Everybody needs a therapeutic outlet.. therefore on with the session Dr. Freud.

My life is starting to really suck.  I have a number of off site issues with situations I never address here.  I have my reasons, namely I don't know who's reading.  Yes believe it or not I do have things that I keep hidden deep in the recesses of my mind.  However, I can relate my latest incident of "I smite the Jonah."   

I was pulling out of a parking lot into four-lanes of traffic last week.  I looked both ways and it was clear.  I made it across the first land and drove THROUGH the passenger side doors of a Lincoln.  The airbag deployed, white powdery shit everywhere, my teeth rattled.  The woman, thankfully, was okay.. as was I.  However, the cop ruled I was at fault-which was the correct ruling.  I have no idea where she came from the first time I saw her car was when I backed my truck out of it.  I got the statement from State Farm and the parts list to fix my Chevrolet was THREE FREAKIN' PAGES long.  Holy Shit.  The estimate is just a shade under $10,000 to fix it.  I bent the frame.  They literally have to rebuild my truck from the frame up.  I have no idea about damages to her car-it's probably even worse.  Hopefully she won't sue me, she seemed nice enough, but lawyers make Saints do weird things.  She was driving a Lincoln so hopefully she doesn't need a bunch of money.  HA, like I'd have any to begin with.  I've got to come up with the 500-dollar deductible  a week before Christmas.  Guess it's back to the plasma-selling clinic for me.  I should be there by about the fourth of July. 

Speaking of people tossing around cash, Jack Whittaker's life is in the shitter.   Almost two years ago to the day the crazy bastard won 315 Million dollars playing Powerball at the C-and-S Superserve (Jeff Kay has the pic of the store) and he has a clipping file from the paper bigger than Barry Bonds.  In two years he's been in a bar fight which he just pleaded no contest to.  Gotten two DUI's. He's been robbed of more than a Million dollars in cash over the course of about a dozen break ins.  He's been sued about four times for sexual harassment in strip bars and casinos.  Some kid committed suicide in his house while he was not there-during a fucking robbery.  His neighbors hate him because he bought the house next door and gave it to the woman who sold him the prize ticket.. she moved in a guy with her that's a registered sex offender.  Now his granddaughter has gone missing and there's a desperate search on to find her.  The Associated Press documented his trials and tribulations this week, it went national, and as a final insult-Rush Limbaugh read the story on his show this week.  His wife says she wishes she'd torn up the ticket.. I guess my life doesn't suck all that bad. 

I saw that site Jeff posted a few weeks ago by the plagiarizing bastard.  Holy shit-he obviously never went to college.  Shit!  At least rewrite it you dumb son-of-a-bitch!  I'd love to get my hands on some of the short-dicked salad-peckers you see on the internet.  I 'd love to see how they'd look after I dropped this 1991 model computer monitor on their fucking heads.    

Could somebody please explain to me why so many guys are mean to their wives and girlfriends?  I just can't cope.  When I was growing up, the number one rule from early in life was NEVER HIT A GIRL.  My next-door neighbor is a great woman, but she's got a shitbag for a husband.  Sometime she comes over to drop something off. but stays for two hours.  I like the woman so I don't mind, and she sits around and talks to my other half---but I think it's just to escape the hell of her asshole ex-husband.  He still lives there and they're divorced.  He works his fingers to the bone at fast-food restaurants.  The guy is in his mid-40's.  He hasn't held one of this food service jobs for more than a month at a time.  If he's so into the short-order cook at that age, why doesn't he open his own restaurant and quit sponging off that poor woman?  I've offered a time or two to castrate him with a chainsaw, but she always declines.  Someday, I'll just do it as a surprise gift.  He'll wake up with a pile of neatly trimmed nuggets in hamburger style on his nightstand.  Wotta Douche as Jeff Kay says.

I'm out of stuff to say.  Comments or questions....the e-mail, as many of your apparently know.... Moonshinebuck@gmail.com

Buck Out.

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